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Why isn’t a SAHM paid like any other job? – Mombie Fitness

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February 10, 2009
Mom

Why isn’t a SAHM paid like any other job?

I was reading a new blog I am following, and came across something really interesting Ann Again brought up.

That women who are SAHM (stay at home moms) have to justify themselves as real people with real opinions in order for the rest of the world to take them seriously. It used to be common place for women to stay at home, now it’s a luxury that most people can’t afford (most familes rely on two incomes.)

I have to admit I was one of these narrow minded people years ago who thought staying at home meant you couldn’t make it big  in the “real world,” so you decided to stay home and play mommy. Please don’t send me hate mail, I no longer hold that point of view and wish desperately that we could afford for me to stay at home.  Before I was a mother, I had no idea just how much work being a mother is. There are no breaks, no vacation, and best of all you do it for free!

Raising a child, teaching a child and loving a child while trying to take care of a home is so completely time consuming and wonderful all the time. It is one of the hardest jobs I’ve ever done. There are no rules, you can’t call in sick and best of all you don’t get paid, but you PAY to have them–are you sensing my issue with this… NO ONE PAYS YOU lol  So why on earth would women want to do this? I certainly never thought I’d be one of those women who wanted to stay home with her child.  In fact I love my job and love what I do, so why on earth am I going to have a hard time going back?

Because loving your job and loving your child are two totally different things. They give you different things at the end of the day. It’s a different feeling of accomplishement when someone at work says, wow we couldn’t have done _________ with out you! Versus hearing your son or daughter say their first word or taking their first steps, it’s just different. And when you go back to work, you likely will miss some milestone in their lives.

I’m one of those women who’s house is always a mess, there are toys everywhere, plates and glasses on the table, but I guarantee you I have a well entertained  happy son on my hands. The dishes can wait.

Being a SAHM is hard, you have to entertain them, all the time!  You know those days you “slack off” at work because you just don’t feel like it, well you don’t get those at home.  Unless you want to put them in front of the television–which I admit I do sometimes (sometimes mom needs to check facebook) you actually need to watch and entertain them constantly. I mean don’t get me wrong, I love Sesame street, but there is only so much of that show I can handle. That damn Baby bear drives me bonkers! 

But my son will be going to daycare (thankfully my MIL has a daycare at home, so I wont have to worry about strangers taking care of my boy) when I return back to work in less then three weeks.  I think it will enable him to have more interaction with children, learn to share and have some structured play time–At least that’s what I tell myself to justify him going to daycare lol

If I won the lottery, would I stay home? Yes. I never ever thought those words would come out of my mouth. But alas, here they are. I am sad to leave my little boy, not to see him do some firsts. I have always been his primary caregiver and it will be hard not to witness some life changing things from him. But life must go on, I must rejoin the “real world” and now I realize how silly it is to define the real world as the workforce. But what is even worse is that now, women are going back to work and still assuming the majority of household duties along with childcare.

God bless all you moms out there who are raising the future (I know corny) of this planet.  Your job as a mother may be taken for granted by some but not by this mom. Keep up the good work, your children will be better for it.

And last but not least, thank you, i’m sure you don’t hear it enough.

    • Deja
    • February 12, 2009
    Reply

    I have a different spin on it. I really wanted to be a SAHM, I am a home body and bit of a June Cleaver anyway so I thought this is for me. Then I realized I’m not entirely happy with this 24/7, something is missing, I lost a bit of myself and became was unhappy at home all the time, we compromised and I work part time out of home, daughter in preschool, son at a home daycare, this works great for us! My point is forget what you’re supposed to do, do what works for you and your family. My kids are happier with a mother whose still got her sanity and working part time! I also think it’s cool for kids to know their mom can be and do a variety of things.

    • Shannon
    • February 12, 2009
    Reply

    Great post Erin. I’m not a mom yet but I certainly know that given the choice, I’d stay at home once I have kids. My mom was able to stay at home till I, the youngest, started school. Unfortunately that’s not a luxury many can afford now a-days. Guess we’ll have to keep trying for the lottery!

    • Colleen
    • February 11, 2009
    Reply

    Erin – I was one of the people who so did not understand the SAHM until I was a Mom. Like you, if I won the lottery, I would quit. I miss the smiles of accomplishment they flash my way when they check to see if I was watching them do what ever they just mastered. I miss the little hands pushing me to be just where they want to me to be. V Cool post.

  1. Reply

    Girlfriend, you need your own talk show. I agree with Cathy about your quote. I work from home but still have to explain because people dismiss the fact that I’m a WAHM. I get interrogated from people wanting to know exactly what I do, when I do it and how long it takes me to get my work done (in a very down their nose sort of tone). Then they make me feel bad for being a WAHM instead of being a SAHM, even though I make sure my little one spends the mornings I’m working in my home office with his Daddy so they can have good one-on-one time. Most of the time I work when my little boy goes to bed and then until the wee hours of the morning but people don’t get that either. You just can’t win!

    • cathy
    • February 10, 2009
    Reply

    So true. Love this quote, “That women who are SAHM (stay at home moms) have to justify themselves as real people with real opinions in order for the rest of the world to take them seriously.” I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve been dismissed when it comes out that I’m a SAHM – nevermind the fact that I have a PhD and was a very successful chemical engineer before I decided that I wanted to stay at home to raise my children.

    Great post!

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