********* working on adding pictures, for some reason it’s not parsing well from live writer
This is a very long post filled with TMI (too much information) so if you don’t want to hear about labour in intimate detailing please come back another day.
Date of Birth: March 5, 2008 @ 5:45 pm
Original Due date: March 29th, 2008
Height and weight: 18 inches and 6lbs 7oz
Wow, well where to begin. My original due date was March 29 th and I was not yet on Mat leave. My last OB appointment had been at 33 weeks and because my doctor was supposed to be going on vacation I didn’t get another appointment until I was 37 weeks.. In the past few weeks I had been having a lot of Braxton hicks since about 30 weeks and I had a feeling that I was going to go early… not 3 weeks early but a week or so early… So here goes.
Monday March 3rd—took three 500mg of Evening Prim Rose Oil internally as I had been taking them since 35 weeks orally. I had also been drinking the Red Raspberry Leaf Tea (at least 2-3 cups a day since 34 weeks)
March 4th—Didn’t feel that great when I got up, but went to work anyways because no one had keys to my desk etc. So I worked the whole day, and ended up staying at work until 6 because I had prenatal classes that night. DH was supposed to come get me but got stuck in a meeting so I took the bus to my classes (it’s only a 15 min ride) and sat in class for the first half hour by myself. It was the breast feeding class so I sent DH home before he joined me to get my bf pillow.
Well he didn’t get there until 7:15 and about 2 minutes after he got there, I felt all warm and wet in my pants, I could tell I was leaking but had no idea if it was Amniotic fluid or pee… but I knew there was lots and as I sit in the front of the class I didn’t want to get up. So I leaned over to DH and said I think my water just broke. He whispered back “you’re sh*ting me, you’re just saying that cause I’m late” so I said, no… I’m not.. so he asked me if I was sure and I said no.. maybe it’s pee.. but I told him I didn’t want to get up in front of the class.. and he said, you’re just saying this cause I’m late your water didn’t really break, and then I felt more warmness and said, umm yes…. it totally did, but class was going on break in 2 minutes so I decided to wait until then to get up. So she stopped talking and I slid off my chair a bit so Miguel could see if it was wet, and it was SOAKED LOL So I tried to grab my jacket and Miguel asked the instructor if someone’s water had ever broken in class, and she said nope… so he said well first time for everything, and I stood up and I gushed again! My grey dress pants were soaked.. I looked like I peed myself, so I was trying to cover myself with my jacket and everyone was staring and clapping and saying how happy they were J And I was sooo embarrassed!
SOOO someone gave me a pad, I ran …well walked to the bathroom and sat on the toilet and more flowed out, it was clear so I wasn’t worried about meconium in the waters but the pad did nothing as I was gushing more and more liquid… at this point I was a little freaked in an excited way and I was shaking a bit… We got in the car and called our doula, then I went home to shower, blow dry my hair (not really well I might add) and call a few friends and my work to let them know what was up.
I really wanted to post to all my wonderful online friends on Baby Center that I was going into labour but we had no computer set up for me as we had just gotten Dominic’s room painted the week before and built his crib (and that was our old office, where the computer was.) But we were waiting for a whole host of things. The crib mattress, the change table, the car seat (that’s a whole other ordeal with airmiles and when I went into labour they had told me that day that they didn’t have any left, so I went to the hospital worrying about how I was supposed to bring home this baby lol) We literally had nothing ready. I had washed some clothes but hadn’t put any of them away, heck I was still working!
The only thing I had prepared was my hospital bag, which I ended up packing way too much stuff in and all the wrong stuff. I think at that point when I asked Miguel for a computer to post on baby center, he thought I had lost it. I told him I’d also wanted to pay a few bills before we left and was beyond agitated when the first lap top I tried was dead. I was still leaking a lot of amniotic fluid, and at this point is when I had no shame left. I had bought depends for after baby was born in case I bled a lot, but I ended up putting an adult diaper on because the pads were just not doing anything. I was so surprised at how much fluid there was.
So my contractions started around 8 or so.. and were getting too close for comfort, I was told by my doula to call obstetrical triage and make sure they wanted me to come in.. I called and they said come so I did LOL we got there around 9 pm I was taken in quickly and OH MY GOD does being checked internally hurt like an SOB.. I was 2 cm’s So that was good news (or so I thought), my contractions were getting stronger but were pretty irregular. Because I was 36 weeks 5 days I was considered pre term and was sent to high risk side.. also my GBS test results were not in my file so they had to give me the drugs anyways
So my labour increased and I was dealing with pretty painful contractions by breathing and such…. I was walking around the hospital floor, squatting, sitting on the ball etc. Miguel’s dad did some reflexology on me when they checked me around 1 to find out if I was progressing.. one of the night nurses was horrible.. she wanted to start me on citocin right away … and I was pretty against that … but when they checked me at 2am and I was still 2 cm’s the nurses started to prepare the drip. My doctor came in and I asked if I could try a little longer on my own, she gave me two more hours and BOY were the nurses peeved. So 4 am rolls around and contractions are still painful… and they check me.. I’m still 2 cms.. maybe close to three. So they start me on the drip and I ask for the epi man… cause of all the stories I read… contractions get horrible on the drip.. So epi man comes around 5:30 am, and he’s fantastic… they also inserted a Foley cath around 7:30 am and I was set to go. I could still feel some of my contractions but nowhere near what I was feeling before. Shift change with the nurses brought some nicer nurses, a student doctor and a student nurse… which by the way was scary at first but they were both very awesome.
So then the new nurse checks me and I’m 4-5 cm’s so woo hoo lets get some sleep and see where things go! I was at 0 station and she said that baby’s head doesn’t feel very big so that’s a good thing! So they tell me to try to get some sleep but the stupid blood pressure machine going off every freaking 10 minutes made it impossible plus I was still feeling my contractions and the top ups just made me kind of numb. So by around 10:30 I was 5 cms and 100% effaced, and the bloody show was going on (those are Miguel’s words—I got him to write stuff down for me) and they pumped up my citocin to get things going.
1:20—i’m 9.5 cm’s and still feeling my contractions on my left side and they think I have a fever because when they took my temperature under my arm for the first time because I had ice chips and they said my temperature was two degrees hotter… so they gave me Tylenol took my temp 30 minutes later and I still had a temperature… then the doctor came in and said take it under her tongue and they did and I was fine.
By 3pm I started to really feel my contractions and no amount of drugs was working.. so the suggested the gas… wow did that make me loopy. So I took it for half of the contraction and then used breathing for the rest.
I was so numb I couldn’t feel the pressure in my bum to push..until around 3:55, so I started to push and when I put my legs up, I lost my contraction to push.. they tried the bar with the sheet, that didn’t work and then one of the nurses suggested they hold my legs (I tried to hold my own legs at first but no sleep and 21 hrs later I had no strength. So the student dr. and Miguel held my legs and the most helpful things for pushing for me was pushing with our stomach muscles and pushing with your bum muscles but also the pelvic floor muscles (kind of like doing legal’s) but really try not to strain your neck, I found that pushing and holding my breath for a few pushes and then pushing and breathing out worked well.
Around an hour and a half of pushing they said that I needed to start pushing harder (baby’s heart rate was getting erratic) and they started talking c section if things didn’t happen in the next 30 minutes.. they didn’t tell me that but talked around me. Again there were 3-4 nurses, 3-4 doctors, the NICU team (3-4) Miguel and my Doula in the room and everyone was talking about how amazing this was and Miguel watched the whole thing… which I find funny cause he didn’t want to confuse that area (business and pleasure LOL) but they all said I was doing a really good job… I couldn’t feel contractions anymore so I just kept pushing cause after all this I was not going to have a freaking c section LOL..
So I felt lots of pressure, and to be honest it was the worst part of my labour, it was the part that I felt the most out of control and I didn’t want to go on but logically I knew that meant it was almost over and people were talking all around me, that drove me crazy!! Miguel was trying to update people who were waiting (on his blackberry) and all I heard was the stupid clicking of the keys!! So I yelled at him to knock it off, and our doula asked him who he was texting, he told her that it was his brothers out in the waiting room and she went out there to go tell them to knock it off 😛 the doctors wanted to check how good I was doing with pushing and being my first time I think I was doing fantastic until this one doctor came in put her hands up me told me to push, and said, “Nope I don’t like that one, that’s not good enough”…. I almost kicked her in the face LOL. I think the thing about pushing is that is does feel good at first.. I almost felt I wasn’t in labour anymore, that is until he descended into the birth canal… then I kind of lost all composure, I was grunting, almost crying and upset, I never thought I’d be cliché and say I can’t do this, I even told myself don’t say it… but I said it anyways, and everyone was really great about how well I was doing. So I guess baby’s head was coming down funny and I really was having a hard time getting him out the doctor started talking about and episiotomy and was being nice and trying to explain it.. and I was telling him to do whatever it was to get him out I didn’t care, just do it, and then he said he was going to try the vacuum and so I just kept pushing with all my might it felt like they were stretching me to kingdom come to make room for baby and then baby’s head came out… they told me to stop pushing.. I knew that meant his cord was around the neck so I remembered from prenatal classes to pant and so I did that…. plus the vacuum that they had put on his head was turning with baby’s head and was about to turn inside me… so they told me to stop pushing right now. So I stopped as best I could the dr. pulled off the vacuum and then I could push again, and he was born.
Dominic Miguel Alexander Carrasco entered this world at 5:45 pm on Wednesday March 5th, at 36 weeks 6 days. Miguel was so shocked they were like where’s dad, dad wants to announce the sex, so Miguel was so busy kissing me saying he was so proud of me and that I did it! He finally looked down and said It’s a boy!
They wiped him off and put him on my tummy and he just looked at me… and wasn’t crying… so I started to get worried and asked if he was ok? Miguel cut the cord and the grabbed him off me to put him on the incubator and they told me that he was having a hard time breathing on his own. I told Miguel not to take his eyes off of him. While they were moving him the “funny doctor” said Look what you did to his head mom…. meaning how I’d squished him… I did not find that funny. He then stitched me up for about 5-10 minutes, it was a second degree episiotomy and some tearing, so he wouldn’t tell me how many stitches… he finished up and said, well looks like you’ve never had a baby and I said it sure doesn’t feel that way. I was in pain instantly after Dominic was out. I asked for pain meds right away and some ice… it sucked that I was alone without my baby while my hubby stayed with him… I think I was very depressed afterwards… I was amazed he was out but I didn’t feel this intense love everyone talked about. I also felt somehow responsible for making him not breathe well and sending him to NICU.
Both my student doctor and student nurse had never seen a natural birth before and stayed an extra three hours after their shift was done just to witness his birth. I was very lucky to have them there, I don’t remember their names but they were fantastic!
My family came into see me and I was all loopy from the drugs I guess but I was not in a good mood… Just trying to cope with it best I could. Miguel came back and said that he was doing better. Then the dr. Came in and said, they were trying to regulate his breathing as it kept going fast, they didn’t think he needed oxygen but weren’t sure… they weren’t sure when I’d get to see my baby. So I got up to empty my bladder (oh yeah and delivering the placenta was nothing, it felt like a slug coming out) had some toast as it’d been a long time since I’d eaten (Tuesday at lunch). Then I finally got into a room with someone else already there.. that sucked because I had really wanted hubby to stay with me even though I knew it wasn’t possible.. I finally got to see him around 9 pm… and he was still in NICU… I wanted to breast feed and such but they didn’t know if I could yet… then the dr. came in and assessed him and said they’d bring him to me in a little bit as he was doing better. He was crying when I came in and I started to hum a song I played for him in utero and he calmed down… he couldn’t open his eyes for very long but alas he was ok!
If you are still reading kudos to you! I had written most of this 4 days after he was born. I had my husband and doula write down how I progressed in labour in Dominic’s book so that I would remember some of it. The next day my coworkers came by to see us at the hospital and surprise surprise, the car seat had arrived. Talk about amazing!
Despite not seeing my little guy for 4-5 hours after he was born, he was an amazing eater. I will do it all over again one day, god willing. To me the hardest part was the first three months afterwards, not the labour. Labour is totally doable and there is an end in site, not to mention a baby. It took me three months to really feel connection to my son, he never slept longer then 1.5-2 hours so I merely coasted through his first 3 months. I’m happy to report that he is one year’s old today and has become a wonderful sleeper and is still a champion eater. My life is very different now, but I wouldn’t change anything in my life.
So happy birthday little one, you’ll always be my baby no matter how old you get.
Mom and Dad